Rewind:
In
A Bad Day For Voodoo, the narrator,
Tyler Churchill rewinds a scene in the book to feature a more dramatic
alternate version. Find out the top
three moments Jeff would rewind and create and alternate version for in his
life.
1. My birth. Aside from the whole "miracle of birth"
thing, there was nothing really dramatic about it. I mean, yeah, my mom thought
it hurt and I was crying and somebody was going "Push! Push!" but for
this moment to really have dramatic impact I should have come out singing "Born
This Way" by Lady Gaga. Then doctors would have been screaming "This
child is unnatural! Destroy it! Destroy it!" but my dad would have stopped
them from squishing me between the defibrillator paddles. After fleeing the
hospital, my parents would have tried to get me to sing so they could make
millions from the miracle singing baby, but I would've been like the frog in
the cartoon and ONLY sang when there were no other witnesses around. Ha!
2. That one time in high school
when I broke my arm. Here
is how I broke my arm: I was playing soccer, and I ran at this guy who had the
ball, and we collided, and I hit the ground. Crunch. The thing is, soccer is
primarily known as a sport you play with your feet. I mean, they even call it football
in other countries. So when you tell people that you broke your arm playing
soccer, they're all like "Huh? What? How do you break your arm playing
soccer?" It's embarrassing. If I could rewind, I could have broken my arm
in a sport where you actually use your arms, like bowling.
3. Writing this guest blog entry.
I'm
writing this on my back porch. My cat is asleep. None of my opponents have made
a move in Words With Friends for the past half hour. Yaaawwwwwn. If I could
rewind, one of my opponents would have played a really lame word, like IT, but
then I'd use their "I" and play QUIZ, where Q was on a Triple Letter
Score and Z was on a Triple Word Score, so I'd get 129 points and even if they had the J and the X they'd never beat
me! Ooooh, such glorious drama!
You Can visit Jeff at his website
or on twitter via @jeffstrand
